The Bible is So Darned Stupid!

I just love my good buddy John Locust! Let me share with you some of his latest words of wisdom:

Hey you stupid Christians! Here's a set of questions to help us determine whether the Bible has been a greater source of evil than good in history:

1) Christian, name me one important moral truth we humans first learned in the Bible, that we still value today, which has not been taught outside of Christian cultures, and which we do not recognize apart from the Bible. After all, the Bible’s morality should always be completely new and different as well as superior to all other morality! We would never expect it to promote the same old values if God was really behind it!

2) Christian, name me as many examples and commands as you can think of that are found in the Bible, which, because they are in the Bible, have caused a great deal of human and animal suffering. I sure know that the command against adultery gave me a lot of heartburn! So did the one against bearing false witness! Why did those have to be in there anyway???

3) Christian, name me as many examples and commands that you can think of that are not found in the Bible, which, if they were in the Bible, would keep people who believe the Bible from committing atrocities. I mean, good grief, why should I have to figure out what “do not commit adultery” means? Why doesn’t God name me personally in that command if he doesn’t want me to commit adultery in particular? Why didn’t he maybe include some pictures of people committing adultery so I could drool over – er, I mean, so I could know what it was? Doesn’t God care about the illiterate, for that matter?

When we compare the lists generated from these requests it should be obvious that the Bible has been a greater source of evil than good in human history. I mean, it sure kept me from having a lot of fun when I was a Christian!